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The nest is empty; the kitchen shouldn't be

The kids are gone, and so is the whining. There's no better time to enjoy cooking than when you and your spouse are home alone.

By HELEN HUNTLEY
Published February 16, 2005

[Times illustration: Rossie Newson]

The first time one of my fellow empty-nesters said "I don't cook anymore," I was shocked. The next two times I heard it, I knew it had to be a trend. When children leave home, some parents hang up their potholders. They'd rather eat out than turn on the oven.

I think they have it all wrong. Yes, cooking can be a chore, but it's one with a big payoff: smaller waistlines and smaller credit card bills, if you do it right. And from my perspective, empty-nest cooking is the best kind of kitchen endeavor.

Cooking for two is vastly better the second time around. I'm a lot better cook now after 30-plus years of practice, and, of course, that newlywed anxiety is gone. I usually know in advance whether my husband will like what I've prepared, and if I'm wrong, he can fix himself a sandwich.

But the big difference is that after you've survived cooking for a family, cooking for two is, well, a piece of cake.

I think eating out and television commercials have taken much of the pleasure out of cooking for a family. I still remember my epiphany on this point, a dozen or so years after the fact.

I was making spaghetti one night after work when the diners began weighing in: My son wanted big meatballs in his sauce. My husband wanted little bits of ground beef in his. My daughter wanted a vegetarian plate. I wanted to run from the kitchen screaming.

It wasn't that their requests were so outlandish. Rather, it was the underlying assumption that we're each entitled to order what we want and we expect the cook to deliver it, an idea reinforced with every fast-food pit stop. Yes, I could refuse and often did, but the response was plenty of grumbling instead of the appreciation cooks crave and deserve.

I salute all you family cooks still persevering over the stove.

With only two people to satisfy now, the odds of a truly happy meal at my house have risen exponentially. And even though my husband and I may be tired and hungry when we get home from work, at least neither of us will be whining about it.

Part of my attraction to home cooking is that I've become a big believer in healthy eating. I've learned too much about restaurants loading up food with butter and oil, serving a day's worth of calories at a single sitting. Greasy foods and thick sauces now strike me as revolting rather than appealing.

If I buy and prepare my food at home, it's not only cheaper, it's often fresher and it's prepared the way I like it: lean meat and vegetables without fattening sauces, plus brown rice, whole wheat bread and olive or canola oil when oil is called for. My husband still puts sour cream and margarine on his baked potato, but I top mine with plain nonfat yogurt and Italian seasonings - and that's the way I prefer it. At home I can eat my special oatmeal and egg concoction for breakfast and my favorite frozen Tofutti bar for dessert after dinner.

An occasional meal out is fun, especially if we're dining with friends or our grown children. There's something to be said for the cook getting to relax along with everyone else. But for everyday eating, there's no place like home, especially when home is an empty nest.

Helen Huntley can be reached at huntley@sptimes.com or 727 893-8230.

Leftovers are great. Pillsbury is targeting empty-nesters with a campaign focused around "cooking for two." They have the wrong approach. I say cook for four and eat the same meal the next night or freeze leftovers for later consumption. I love walking in the door knowing dinner is just minutes away.

Think of yourself. When I cooked for the family, I never made a dish if I knew I was the only one who would eat it. Now I do. I buy frozen vegetables in bags so I can shake out a single serving for myself. If it's a casserole, I freeze the leftovers in single-serving portions.

Think ahead. Planning out the main dishes for the week takes just a few minutes and eliminates last-minute trips to the grocery store.

Prep ahead. Because I'm hungry when I get home, I favor quick weeknight meals. If a meal involves a lot of prep work, I often do that in the morning before work. If I worked an earlier schedule, I prep the night before.

Share the work. My husband does most of the grocery shopping (bless his heart) and often the cleanup. I'm all in favor of cooking together if your partner is willing.

Get the right equipment and use it. I recommend a microwave oven, a Crock-Pot and a George Foreman grill or its equivalent. I love coming home and smelling beef stew cooking in the slow cooker. If you want to serve chicken breasts, nothing beats the grill for speed.

Try something new occasionally. It's both easy and boring to let yourself get into a rut. I look for new recipes that are healthy and relatively simple. Evelyn Tribole (Healthy Homestyle Cooking, Intuitive Eating) is my favorite cookbook author.

[Last modified February 15, 2005, 11:39:04]